needing vs. not sparing

Many years ago, I worked with a teacher who would admonish my use of the word "need". Her point was that "need" as such implied a lack of choice in action, thinking etc. That thought bent my mind--I still struggle with the concept of "needing" to do things. When that comes up and I don't want to do the thing that I supposedly "need" to do I am stumped for motivation.

Needing to do things, the invisible and imaginary force that externally drives action, is powerful. Turning "need" into a paper tiger didn't necessarily make my life more pleasant but it made it more interesting.

I'm writing this blog post from the floor of a conference room. I cannot stand sitting in the rolling chairs they have in here especially for these 6+ hour meetings. The world appears to be turning just the same.

Its simpler to be obedient. Not better...just simpler.

Still, without the invisible iron hand of "need", how to get myself to do things that difficult in the moment? In the context of "need" I can bully myself into doing many things but after a while my inner anarchist gives "need" the finger--especially since I know need is a false driver.

I started playing around with the word need and its antonyms. Words I came up with are surplus, luxury, comfort, fortune, plenty, have and spare. Interesting that "need" and "have" are opposites but mean the same thing in certain contexts; I need to do something or I have to do something. But, a sentence such as I need money is FAR different from I have money.

The word that jumped out as the perfect antonym  was spare--to "not spare" actually.

"Not sparing" makes activities sound like seasonings...like not sparing the garlic in the pasta sauce, not sparing the Valrhona chocolate or not sparing the Blue Label Scotch. These all sound pretty good to me! 

I've been on the edge of giving the need monster the finger lately so I am definitely going to be trying this out (I will will NOT spare the pushups! I will NOT spare the foam roller! I will NOT spare doing a longer plank session!). 

Ok, now I will NOT spare attention to this slide. After that I will NOT spare finishing up my tasks before going home where I will NOT spare a rendezvous with the beer I brewed before Staycation.